Only Hope
by ne-ma-pa-sa-ra
Summary: {One Shot}Landon thoughts on how his life has changed since Jamie left.


**Only Hope**

**One-Shot by ne-ma-pa-sa-ra**

**A Jamie/Landon Fic**

_There's a song that's inside of my soul  
It's the one that I've tried to write over and over again I'm awake in the infinite cold  
But You sing to me over and over and over again_

The day she went away was so far away yet he still felt the pain. The grief, the look in her eyes when she took her last breath. It was unbearable to him having to let her go. Everything about her, he had to forget, but how could you forget your one first love? Your only love? You possibly couldn't.

She was perfect in his eyes. Now matter what the situation she always had a smile on her face. She would dance like no one was watching and sing like no one was listening. But secretly he was watching and he was listening and he loved every minute of it. He loved her.

Her soul was so purified, so innocent he was actually scared to take her that night. The night he would always remember. The ceremony was small, peaceful and everything they could have ever hoped for. So when it came the time he became petrified, nervous out if his mind. She noticed and she assured him it was alright, everything would be alright.

He could still taste her, and he just wanted more but he realized that night was long gone and all he could do was preserve the memories. So as he walked through the halls he made it through the door into a room, a room spent to dwell on thoughts. He walked up to the window and stepped onto the balcony. Resting his arms on the ledge he let his head hang as he closed his eyes meanwhile enterwining his fingers.

_So I lay my head back down  
And I lift my hands  
and pray to be only Yours  
I pray to be only Yours  
I know now you're my only hope_

Sing to me the song of the stars  
Of Your galaxy dancing and laughing  
and laughing again  
When it feels like my dreams are so far  
Sing to me of the plans that You have for me over again

He glanced up at the night sky. The million stars throughout the galaxies. Remembering the nights they spent together in each others arms looking up at constellations and shooting stars. They would always wish upon a shooting star when it streaked through the sky. A shooting star passed by and he didn't wish.

He dreamt of her every night. Every waking moment was thought of her and what could've been. He just wanted her back but it just wasn't going to happen so for that, his dreams were dead.

_So I lay my head back down  
And I lift my hands and pray  
To be only yours  
I pray to be only yours  
I know now you're my only hope_

I give You my destiny  
I'm giving You all of me  
I want Your symphony  
Singing in all that I am  
At the top of my lungs I'm giving it back

Tears fell and he ran a hand through his hair. It was all too much for him, what was he to do? He had no reason for living anymore, he had no reason at all but yet he still lived on because he felt her sympathy. He closed his eyes hearing her beautiful voice singing like her life depended on it. How she could make him feel tingly inside when she sang was amazing. _  
_  
_So I lay my head back down  
And I lift my hands and pray  
To be only yours  
I pray to be only yours  
I pray to be only yours I know now you're my _

So he stood there, looking out into the sky dreaming no dreams, living no life, going nowhere, nothing but an empty shell. He couldn't help it. She had told him to live life to the fullest but he just couldn't, not with out her. He still remembered her last words, never did he imagine that they were for him. She spent her last few seconds struggling to utter those three words. She didn't have to say it because he knew. He knew. So as he held her hand she whispers so softly the words she's declined to speak, "I love you."

Standing there he opened his eyes and looked down over the balcony, it was just too tempting. He would be with her and be by her side. But he loved her so he backed away, slowly. He walked away from the balcony. He would live life with no faith because she was gone…

"…_Only hope"_


End file.
